Halloween

I love Halloween, it's one of my favorite holidays.  In recent years I have gone all out with food and such.  I was so excited to have two babies to dress up this year.  It hits you and different moments, when you have lost a child.  Mine hit today when I went to the Disney store to see about pre ordering a movie.  I found these adorable baby body suits that were princess dresses.  It made me cry.  I know I will have a little one to celebrate the holidays with but it still hurts that my baby girls will never have a chance to grow up.

On top of our loss, my sister in law is dealing with stage 4 ovarian cancer at age 19.  My huge family just lost one of its larger than life members at only 45 years old.  Everyone just asks why me?  Why do we have to deal with all of that?

I don't know the answers to those question, but I know we will work through it.